It seems like every fitness news outlet has their version of “Types of People You See At The Gym.” This Huffington Post article is a good example of what I mean. But the thing is, these posts are pretty much all the same. I’m not sure what kind of gym they think their average reader goes to, but it’s not my gym. My gym has much more character than that.
So, without further ado, here are the ” 5 Types of People You Actually See at the Gym.”
*disclaimer: I’m not hating. Seriously. I love that every one of these people is coming to the gym, and I always get a total kick out of seeing all of them… and I really appreciate it!
1. The Old Asian Lady
You can usually find the Old Asian Lady a) naked and b) in the hot tub. I have never, ever, ever seen any one of them do any sort of workout. In fact, I’ve never even seen them on the gym floor. But there are always at least 3 Old Asian Ladies in the locker room, chatting away with each other and monopolizing the sauna, steam room, and whirlpool. I would assume they must have done some exercise—it is a gym, after all—but until I see it, I remain skeptical.
2. The Computer Geek
It is the heart of Silicon Valley, so you’re bound to see your fair share of these guys. You can usually identify them by their over-full beards and their nerdy t-shirts (the skinny type doesn’t come to the gym, oddly enough). The Computer Geek doesn’t do anything particularly offensive, but no matter how many times he goes the gym, he never seems to get any more comfortable with the equipment. Nor does his body type change in any way. He also LOVES to make conversation with you, usually awkwardly.
3. The Boys’ Club
These guys are my favorite. At least 60 years old, usually with a pronounced belly, they somehow always seem to surround you on the treadmill… and proceed to have (occasionally very personal) conversations over and around you. They stare at you curiously until your workout is finished, and then: engage. Much like the Old Asian Lady, going to the gym is just an excuse for The Boys’ Club to get together. They also enjoy standing around in the weight room to watch and discuss the college football/basketball game on TV.
4. The Racquetballers
Similar to The Boys’ Club members, the Racquetballer is middle- to golden-aged. Easily spotted for their gray sweat shorts, baggy tees (tucked in, of course!), calf-high socks, and rec specs, they are in a world of their own. They show up at the same time, same place, every week, and have a clearly-written game schedule for the next 2 months. They are loud, and clog up the hall, but damn do they love coming to play racquetball with their friends!
5. The Out-of-Place SuperJock
There are 2 guys (plus one girlfriend) who I see at the gym on occasion. They are the kind of obnoxious gym-goers all the rest of the lists seem to mention: they grunt, yell, throw weights down, and love looking at themselves in the mirror. They monopolize all of the free weights. However, my favorite characteristic of the SuperJock is their propensity to wear shirts so cut up they are shoulder thongs.